07/04/2024 - 'Father of the Bride' by David

After two years of excitement following the announcement of their engagement, my daughter Rachel married her boyfriend Max this week, and it was a glorious and emotional day.

The venue, a farmhouse with converted barns, within the island's West Wight countryside, was gorgeous, and the day was just perfect. 

While the ladies were having their hair and make up done at the farmhouse, the men were in the annex trying on our jackets and ties. We could hear them laughing, helped along by prosecco, while we were sorting our button holes and pocket squares between kraken shots. I wore my dad's ring and the cufflinks with Father Of The Bride etched on them that Rachel had given me. I was also presented with a tie that had a photo of the two of us from when she was a baby, printed on the inside. It was a lovely touch, and I couldn't wait to see her in her dress.

Since my diagnosis, Rachel and I have been hoping that my failing legs would allow me to walk her down the aisle, and with my dad's stick and my daughter's arm, we both got our wish.  

I was waiting in the house as Rachel came downstairs, and when I saw her for the first time in her dress, she looked so beautiful, and the first of many tears that day, fell. She looked so gorgeous, standing infront of me, waiting to marry the man she loved. Her hair and makeup were lovely, and her wedding dress was exquisite. We both held hands, and looked into each other's eyes, beaming, and sparkling. 

My younger daughter Anna, was the maid of honour, and she looked beautiful in sage green. She led the procession from the farmhouse, across the courtyard, followed by the bridesmaids, the flower children, and Rachel with her stepdad Mark, who passed her over to me at the entrance to the wedding barn, where I was waiting with a beaming smile and pride to match.

As I took her hand, the song Married Life from the film Up began, which was a Baker family favourite, and we looked at each other, both trying and failing to hold back the tears. It is every father's wish to walk their daughter down the aisle, and it was such an honour to be asked to hold her hand as we walked, smiling to each other, past Rachel and Max's families and friends.

The applause at the end of the ceremony, set the tone for the day, and it was such a joyful day full of photos, food, smiles, speeches, tears, music and dancing. 

I welcomed Max and his big family into the equally large Baker/Parkinson/Rawlinson family, and spoke of my pride and love for Rachel, then Max added a heartfelt and funny assessment of his new family, before his two brothers, as best men, delivered a hilarious comedy double act speech, which had us all in stitches. Anna then had us in tears again, as she spoke of the amazing influence Rachel's love, support and guidance has been to her, before Mark wrapped it up, thanking all who had contributed financially, physically,  or emotionally, in helping to organise such a wonderful day.

Unbeknown to Anna, Rachel and Max had chosen a version of I Can't Help Falling In Love With You for their first dance, that Anna had recorded with her boyfriend Jake, and it was lovely to see one of my daughters dancing with her new husband, to a song being sung by my other daughter. 

The next song was for the bride and the bride's father and we chose Yellow by Coldplay, as it was one of our favourites when she was young. I closed my eyes as we danced and imagined a world where I would be around to see her and her children grow up, and for a few moments I actually believed it would be true. Hopefully, she will become a mother, and a part of me will live on. 

Halfway through the song, she said to me that she was handing me over to Anna and I then took the hand of my youngest baby. We danced, with tears in our eyes, both knowing exactly why we needed to have this dance today, and I held her tight, and told her that I would always be with her, and in her heart forever. I can only dream about her wedding, but what a beautiful dream I will have. 

I was on a natural high, and belied my symptoms by dancing to the band and the disco for most of the night. I can't seem to walk for much more than five minutes, but I can dance for hours!

The wedding ended like a million others do, eating cake and dancing to ABBA, and was like every other wedding, special to the happy couple, and everyone present. But to me, this wedding was also poignant, significant, and bearing in mind, my prognosis, essential. I went to bed, feeling like a very happy, and lucky boy.

After a couple of days to reflect and recover, I went out for a reunion with the boys from the Bobby I Can Fly, the band that I played with until very recently, and it was great to meet up for a pub and curry night. We laughed like the young boys we were back in the 80's, when we first made music, and we reminisced about the great times we have had over the last 40 years. We signed each other's copies of the vinyl record we produced this year, and vowed to meet up again soon. 

Unfortunately, my symptoms continue to deteriorate and I can now only walk unaided around the house, and take my stick whenever I go outside.

I've also noticed recently that being outside in cold temperatures affects my hands strength and movement. Although there were patches of warm, sunny spells on the wedding day, most of the day was overcast and windy, and we were probably outside for about half an hour for the photos. By the time we had returned to the barn, I could only grip my pint glass with both hands as they were cold and weak. Alice had the great idea of getting me a mug of hot water, which I warmed my hands around and within five minutes, the warmth and strength in my hands returned. She has since ordered me a pair of self warming gloves. I will wear them and report back with their effectiveness. I also had trouble buttoning up my wedding shirt, and fitting the cufflinks was totally out of the question so Alice helped me with these tasks too. She is looking after me so well, and I really do appreciate it. 

On Saturday afternoon, I went to watch Cowes Sports FC with my brother, and we met up with some friends that we used to play football with. Both Rich and I played for Cowes, and it's always nice to meet in the clubhouse for a beer before the game as there are always lots of ex players doing the same thing as we are - watching the young lads on the pitch, wishing we could still do what they are doing now.

We finished an exhausting but brilliant week by cheering on the runners at the Southampton marathon

I have previously run the 10K, the half, the full marathon twice, and last year we volunteered out on the course. In the last year, I have gone from running the Nottingham 10K in April, to struggling to walk 200 yards to the bus stop, such has been the progression of this devastatingly horrible disease, but we must accept it and make the most of what I can still do. 

I couldn't get around the town to the cheer spot under my own steam so Andy gave me a 'backy' on a scooter and we only fell off once which is good going!

At the bridge, we gave out vegan sweets and cut oranges, and encouraged everyone round and then piled into Thrive to hear of everyone's successes.

Our lovely friend Claire ran for the local MNDA and has raised nearly £900 in my name. I'm very grateful she chose this charity for her first ever half marathon!

It was heartwarming to see thousands of runners of all abilities, running for themselves or for charities, who have trained for months, and the effort and the pride on their faces as they ran into the finish line was amazing. I miss that feeling so much, but who knows, maybe I will be on the start line next year in my running buggy, being pushed by my wife/carer/best friend Alice x